Recruitment Tactics
by ATPD
Summary: ONE-SHOT : Ed had had his fair share of superior officers trying to recruit him over to their teams. All of their tactics just as useless as Roy Mustang on a rainy day. When an officer does not want to take "no" for an answer however, it's up to Mustang to find him before it's too late. NO PAIRINGS! Rated T because of some violence and language.


**So this idea just came into my mind and I had to write it down.**

**I hope you'll enjoy!**

* * *

If there was one thing Ed was getting sick of after two years in the military, it was superior officers trying to convince him to join their teams instead of Mustang's. Those bastards tried to use all sorts of methods to bribe him over to their side, and Ed wanted nothing more than to punch them.

It had first started a month after he had joined the military and he had stopped a gang of alchemist bank robbers single-handedly. Back then it had been Lieutenant Colonel Greys who had come to him, acting like he was some sweet little kid that just wanted a daddy. Ed had said no.

Then, with him saving a town from a gigantic flood, and the whispers about him being "The Hero of the People" had started up, two more had come, both trying the same tactics as Greys, both failing miserably.

When Ed had caught a serial killer that had the whole Eastern area terrified a month after that again, Major General Thorson had cornered him as he had been heading for the cafeteria.

That one still stood vividly out in his mind.

Ed had been walking from Mustang's office when suddenly a thick man in his forties had presented himself as Major General Thorson. He had put a hand on Ed's shoulder, leading him down through the hallways until they came to a secluded corner.

"I have a proposition for you, Edward, dear."

"If you want me to join your team, you're fighting a losing battle," Ed had told him stubbornly.

"Oh, come on now, Ed. I only want what's best for you. Think about how you could rise through the ranks when working under me! You could earn more money! And I'd always look after you, dear boy."

"Not interested."

Ed had turned around to leave, when the man had suddenly dragged him back, sliding a hand under his shirt and kissed his neck while whispering. "Don't be like that, we could have so much fun, you and I…"

"LET ME GO YOU SICK BASTARD!"

"Not until you say yes, dear," he had said, stroking Ed's side suggestively.

The sheer shock of the situation had kept Ed from defending himself until he had been partially lifted into the air by the pervert. That was when he had been very glad to hear stomping coming in their direction.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING TO MY SUBORDINATE!?" Mustang had shouted as he pulled on his ignition gloves.

Thorson had dropped Ed to the ground and he had hurriedly scooted several feet away from the man. Hawkeye had appeared quickly after, her gun trained at Thorson.

"Lieutenant, please escort Major General Thorson here to the holding cells and tell them that he's been arrested for sexually assaulting a minor."

"Yes, Sir."

Mustang had then gone over to Ed and helped him get to his feet. "Are you okay?"

"How did you know where I was?"

"I saw you two as you headed out of the office. Guess I didn't like the look in his eye. So I grabbed Hawkeye and tried to follow you, although you disappeared for a moment until you shouted."

"Oh, thanks, I guess."

"Don't mention it."

Three months after that again, Colonel Pyers had walked over to him, requesting a quick word as he sat eating his lunch. She had gone straight to business about furthering his military career and all that crap for about five minutes until Ed had got the opportunity to say that he wasn't interested.

Ten more had come to him the following year, none of them succeeding. Mustang had begun to show up quite soon after his talks were done ever since the incident with Thorson.

Because fact was, Ed actually liked his colleagues. He liked the differences and the loyalty and the fact that they weren't too worried about ranks. He liked that they were a real team. He wasn't interested in his career or the money he could make, and the only ones who knew that was Mustang and Hawkeye. The two of them had kept his secret for him, made sure that he wasn't arrested and his brother sent off to some sort of lab. He was thankful for it, although he wouldn't say it.

And so he would be staying with them until Al had his body back.

He was thinking about this as he was walking through the halls of East HQ, when he suddenly heard a few quick footsteps behind him.

"Oi! Elric! A word please."

Ed sighed and stopped, thinking that this was probably another recruitment attempt. He watched as a few soldiers complained about him being in the way.

A stranger walked up to him, smiling warmly. "Major Elric, would you please join me for lunch in my office? I'm new here and are trying to get to know some of the most important names here at East HQ. Oh, sorry, name's Brigadier General Jonah Lains." He extended his hand and Ed shook it.

"Sure," Ed said, not really seeing the trouble with joining the man. He was really on his way to pick up some papers for the Colonel, but he wasn't going to miss an opportunity to spite him.

Ed followed the man to an office down a hall that he hadn't been in before.

"Here's my office," the man said, still smiling. He held the door open for him and Ed went inside. "Please find yourself a seat."

Ed sat down on one of the two couches, and Lains began preparing tea and some sandwiches.

"I hear you did an excellent job with finding those kidnappers the other day, congratulations."

"Thank you."

Ed couldn't really place it, but something was starting to feel off. There was something about the General that he couldn't quite put his finger on, but it was wrong. Ed was going to drink his tea and then make some excuse to leave this office.

Lains sat down with a tray with the promised lunch. He poured the tea for Edward, then handed him the cup. Ed took a few hasty sips.

"Mustang was a lucky one to get you on his team. You are the talk of the military and your name is often enough to get heads to turn. You're a walking, talking advertisement for the best parts of the military."

Ed wasn't listening. He was beginning to feel weird. His eyelids were getting heavy and the room was spinning slightly.

He got up, panic rising, especially seeing as how Lains just kept on smiling.

Ed kept getting sleepier and sleepier by the second, and he staggered towards the office door. The room was spinning at an alarming rate and he fell sideways a few feet away from the door. He lay on the floor, his body not able to listen to every instinct in him screaming for him to get away.

Ed could hear Lains' footsteps approaching. "You and I are going to have a little discussion…"

* * *

Roy was annoyed.

He had sent Fullmetal off to gather those documents forty-five minutes ago, and he still wasn't back. He would usually have sent Hawkeye, but she was recuperating in the hospital after taking a bullet during a mission two days ago. Fortunately, she would be completely fine in a few weeks, but it meant that for fourteen days, Roy would have to cope without his assistant.

Where the hell is that kid?

Roy sighed and left the office to look for him. He figured the cafeteria was the best bet at the moment, it was about lunch time and Fullmetal always liked to find new ways to piss Roy off. He passed quite a few soldiers in the halls as he walked through them.

He didn't find the kid in the cafeteria nor in any of the restrooms. He wasn't anywhere to be found. After a while he started asking random soldiers if they had seen him, but they didn't have any information either.

Now Roy was getting worried.

He doubted that the kid had managed to run into trouble at HQ, but that incident with Thorson two years ago had scared most of them quite a lot.

Roy walked all over the building, through halls that didn't really make any sense to walk through really, but he figured that he should make sure. He ran into a couple of young soldiers who looked curiously up at him as he approached, but then straightened up the minute they saw that he outranked them quite a lot.

"Have any of you seen the Fullmetal Alchemist?"

"Don't know, Sir, what does he look like?"

"Short, blonde and wearing a red coat."

"So that's who the kid is? I was wondering what Brigadier General Lains would want with him."

"When was this?"

"Little over an hour ago I think."

"Okay, thank you."

Roy marched off down the hall, hoping that he remembered correctly as to where the new General had his office. He was relieved to see that he was right. He was going to tell Fullmetal off for skipping his duties. He was probably having a good laugh with the General about it all.

He knocked on the door, but he received no answer.

After a minute he went into the office, finding it vacated. What caught his eye immediately was the tray with sandwiches and the abandoned teacup. Roy went over to check the temperature of the beverage, finding it stone cold. Then he saw the smashed teacup lying on the floor and felt his stomach clench.

* * *

Ed was drowsy. His head hurt. Everything was spinning and he could barely keep his eyes open.

"Hi, Edward, I'm so glad you could join me," Lains said.

Ed tried to focus his eyes, trying to find out what was going on. He was tied to a chair, each wrist bound to their armrests. His legs were bound as well. He was trapped.

The man in front of him smiled sweetly. He was sitting on another chair.

"What's going on?" Ed asked.

"I wanted to speak to you in private so I figured that this would be the best place to do so."

Ed searched the room. He was in a stone basement, sitting there in only his boxers.

"What the hell do you want?"

"I want to recruit you, Edward. I want a nice team that people will look up to. One that the public will trust. And for that I need you on my team. Say goodbye to Colonel Mustang, join me and we can make this country better!"

"Not happening."

"So you really want to be on the Flame Colonel's team? Do you know how many people that he has killed with his alchemy? How many innocent lives were lost in Ishbal because of him? That man represents everything that needs to change in the military! And that assistant of his is no different!"

"They seem alright to me."

"But they're not! Edward, they don't care about you one bit! You're just a tool for Mustang to use! If you were on my team, I would care for you like my own son! Don't you want that?"

"No, I don't! Now let me go!"

If there was one thing Ed didn't want, then it was a father. He'd had enough of them after Hohenheim left.

"I'm afraid that I can't do that, Edward. You're staying right where you are until you say yes to my offer."

"Then I guess we'll be staying here for a long time."

"I see you need some persuasion, then."

Lains picked up a baseball bat and proceeded to slam it against Ed's stomach.

* * *

Roy was furiously looking through files until he found the one on Jonah Lains. His record seemed alright, Roy guessed. He was in his fifties, greying black hair, bit of a stomach. Roy didn't really care about that, though. The only thing that he cared about was the home address. Finding it, he read it twice, then he raced to his car.

He drove as fast as he could. He couldn't help but worry about his youngest subordinate. Fullmetal was a kid after all, a kid that Roy was supposed to protect as his Commanding Officer. And it was Roy who had brought him into the military in the first place, so if one of the officers hurt him, it would be Roy's fault for not looking after him.

Roy didn't know if the kid was fine and just out for a walk, but he always managed to get himself into trouble, and Roy wasn't going to risk finding Fullmetal dead in an alley just because it probably wasn't anything.

And so he drove the next twenty minutes with increasing tension, fighting the mental pictures that kept coming to his mind, all involving a bloody, broken, dead boy with a blonde plait and staring, golden eyes that would never see anything again.

Roy drove as fast as he could. He still had ten minutes left until he'd be there.

And what was he going to do if he wasn't there? Where would he go next?

He kept imagining worst case scenarios involving the young boy. He wasn't going to let that happen. He would find him.

He finally reached the house, opening the door without even bothering to knock. He walked inside. "FULLMETAL! ARE YOU THERE!"

"COL-!" a voice said from under the floorboards, but was cut off quickly. Roy ran until he found the door to the cellar, hurrying down the stairs, fingers ready to snap. He was careful to kick open the door, but jump back instantly in case of bullets.

And they came.

Six of them.

Which meant that the man had emptied his gun in his desperation.

"Come out, Mustang! Come out or I'll slit your precious little subordinate's throat!"

Roy cursed inwardly, stepping through the doorway and into the room.

"Put your hands up!"

Roy did as he was told and then turned to face his subordinate.

Anger surged through him.

The kid's chest was just a mess of bruises and cuts, it looked like his fingernails had been pulled out and his ankle was definitely broken.

And the bastard who had done this had the nerve to hold a knife against the kid's throat as well.

"So it seems you do care slightly about your subordinate after all. Or are you just here to retrieve your poster boy?"

"You think I don't care about my subordinate? HOW DARE YOU!"

"Oh, so Papa Roy came to save him, did he?"

"Told you he would," Fullmetal said weakly.

"Shut up, Edward! The grownups are talking!" He quickly slashed the blade across the kid's chest, making a deep cut.

Fullmetal just grunted.

"You bastard! Let him go!"

"Can't do that yet, Mustang. Edward still hasn't changed his mind about joining my team."

"You're trying to recruit him?!"

Roy was angry as hell by now. The kid had been suffering just because of his loyalty to his team. What was worse was that Roy had promised himself that he'd be there to look after Fullmetal when it came to these sorts of things ever after Thorson.

**_You failed him, Roy._**

"So what are you gonna do now, you bastard?" the kid said.

"You don't learn, now do you, Edward?" Lains stabbed the knife into the kid's shoulder, making him yelp with pain, which was when Roy had snapped his fingers, shooting a flame through the room and in behind Lains, burning his back severely. The man screamed and began rolling on the floor. Roy snapped again, burning the man's entire skin, rendering him unable to attack. Roy ran forwards to the panting kid.

"You came."

"Always. Now let's get you to a hospital."

He untied Ed's arms and legs before he removed the knife and threw off his jacket to press it against the wound. He lifted him up, one arm behind his back, the other under his knees. Then he carried him out of this wretched house and into the car.

Deciding that he wanted to keep an eye on the kid, he sat him down with him in the front seat. The child had curled in on himself and was lying with his head on Roy's lap.

"You'll be okay, kid, we're going to look after you like we always do."

* * *

Ed smiled a bit to himself. This was the main reason that he would never swap teams, because they were a family.

And family was more important than anything.

* * *

**There you go! That was my first one-shot so I hope you enjoyed!**


End file.
